Moving to a bigger city wasn’t really a plan of mine. I just wanted to get away from the boredom of my own small city. So I came to the Tavern of the seas (Cape Town)…all in the name of fun. Now its the equivalent of cross-fit for adapting.
I took for granted all the creature comforts that my own little city has/had. The more I spend time here, the more I realize that my city will have to change with me once I do go back.
So as my ideas about life, reality and the humans that populate my time are crushed, I’m learning to take the punches without too much damage. Not directly. Deflection helps a lot. In this case, it’s about learning how to justify other people’s behaviour. They won’t. I don’t have to.
Unless I want to understand why they do/say the things that they do.
Do I feel like I’m being personally attacked by people I thought I could trust? I used to feel that way.
By gang members in the distance. By badly trained security guards. By leaders of organisations. By beggars on the street.
Maybe they’re just doing what they need to do to survive in a cruel world. Am I being naive in clinging on to my comfort of humanity? Maybe…
So what am I learning about the people that have shown me the different kinds of violence that exist? I’m learning that it isn’t direct in most cases. It’s also backed up by experiences that they’ve had in their past that they can’t help but bring forward into their future.
So like the wind, the past really is just a force that pushes us forward or knocks us down.
It’s time I stopped taking people’s inability to recognise my talent as my own downfall.
Maybe it’s time I turned my back on the obsolete ideologies that still exist. Gather myself and the ones who do recognise me and put the sails up.
Smile and wave.